10 Drobtinice iz gozdnega odmika – Zaključek: Nadzorovana norost // Conclusion: Controlled insanity

Tolteški vidci bi temu smelemu podvigu vzpostavitve in ohranjanja notranje čistine rekli nadzorovana norost. Videc ve, da se podaja v hladen, neobčutljiv svet, ki mu ni mar zanj, pa se vseeno odloči, da stopi vanj z vsem zaupanjem nekoga, ki tega še ne ve… kot jagnje, ki ve, da je njegova usoda zakol, pa kljub temu veselo bleja. Njegova moč izhaja iz Razumevanja v njem in ni odvisna od okoliščin.

V Tarotu je prva karta prebujenja karta Norca, ki oblečen v mavrične barve, s cvetom v desnici in pesmijo na ustih, poševno hodi po robu prepada. Ve, da bo izdan, prevaran, okraden, osovražen in preziran, vseeno pa ga dejanja drugih ne premaknejo iz njegove točke, iz katere živi zaupanje do življenja. Za seboj pušča radost, ki je vonj tega zaupanja, spoštovanje do dejanj drugih, naj bodo še tako zablodela in ljubezen do darovanega Življenja, ki si najbolj želi zaživeti ta Dar. Nedolžen kot novorojenec si ne more misliti, da bi mu kdo karkoli hotel.. in tudi, ko mu kdo stori kaj hudega, ga dejanja drugega ne umažejo. On bo še vedno radostno svojo pesem pel.

To ni lahko… brez podpore rednih krajših ali daljših gozdnih odmikov, meni to ne bi uspelo in mi ne uspeva, kadar se v tem zanemarim. Sama od sebe nimam moči. To je kultiviran duh ali nadzorovana norost tistih, ki so doživeli človeški svet samo zato, da vedo, kaj zapuščajo in z njim občujejo kot nekdo, ki vanj vstopa kot obiskovalec raje kot stanovalec. Pozna ga, v njem živi, vendar ni iz njega in ga s svojim strinjanjem ne vzdržuje zase… odmaknjen in spokojen jadra nad nizkimi valovi in neprekinjeno zre v Moč, ki veje za njim.


Drobtinice iz gozdnega odmika // Flashes from the forest retreat

1 Obredno obnašanje // Ritual behaviour

2 Točka pozornosti // Point of attention

3 Ljubezen je v zraku // Love is in the air

4 Dotik živega // A touch of living 

5 Balvani na reki Življenja // Boulders on the river of Life

6 Kaj hoče Življenje od mene? // What does Life want from me?

7 Življenjsko vodstvo // Life guidance

8 Post od sebe // Fast from yourself

9 Kaj bi naredilo Sonce? // What would the Sun do?

10 Zaključek: Nadzorovana norost // Conclusion: Controlled insanity


A flash from a forest retreat – Conclusion: Controlled insanity


Toltec seers would call this bold feat of establishing and maintaining inner purity, the controlled madness. The seer knows that he is venturing into a cold, insensitive world that it doesn’t care about him, but he still decides to enter it with all the confidence of someone who doesn’t know that yet… like a lamb who knows that its destiny is slaughter, but still bleats happily. His power comes from Understanding in him and does not depend on circumstances.

In the Tarot, the first card of awakening is the card of a Fool, dressed in rainbow colors, with a flower in his right hand and a song in his mouth, walking obliquely along the edge of the abyss. He knows that he will be betrayed, deceived, robbed, hated and despised, yet the actions of others do not move him from his point of view, from which he trusts in life. It leaves behind traces of joy, which is the scent of this trust, respect for the actions of others, even if they are deluded, and love for the gifted Life, which wants more than anything to live this Gift. An innocent as a newborn cannot think that anyone would want to harm him… and even when someone does something bad to him, the actions of another do not defile him. He will still joyfully sing his song.

This is not easy… without the support of regular shorter or longer forest retreats, I wouldn’t be able to do this and I don’t succeed when I neglect it. I have no power on my own. This is the cultivated spirit or controlled madness of those who have experienced the human world just to know what they are leaving behind and to communicate with it as someone who enters it as a visitor rather than a resident. He knows it, he lives in it, but he is not out of it, and he does not sustain it with his consent… distant and serene sails over the low waves and stares incessantly at the Power blowing behind it.

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